This
one act play is a work of fiction. The Protagonist and the characters he
presents on screen are fictional characters as well even though they are named
after living persons currently holding positions in the government of the United
States. No attempt has been made to
accurately penetrate the inner thoughts or feelings of the living man, Colin
Powell. Indeed, Colin Powell may not be able to do that although he is in a
much better position than I to attempt such a feat. The Colin Powell in this
play is a representative character, not unlike Everyman, who must face his
inner self, having lived a life contrary to the values, principles, and morals
that had governed his behavior before his ascent to the pinnacles of power. The
Colin Powell in the Bush administration has appeared at times to openly
confront the decisions that drive this administration, yet has always backed
down, accepted the necessity of the acts, or remained silent in acquiescence of
them. That behavior gave rise to the intent of the play as it seemed to
eloquently represent an individual in crisis -- duty versus self. The play is a
fictitious portrayal of a person in spiritual and emotional agony confronting
his dark night of the soul.
The Agony of Colin
Powell A Dramatic Monologue in One Act William A. Cook
Scene:
A five star hotel suite close to the UN building in NYC. The room opens from
the main double doors at the rear of the stage. The entrance offers a crescent
table to the right of the entrance and a door to the bedroom on the left. A few
steps from the door there is a step into the main room. It offers a large “L”
shaped couch set, end tables with elegant lamps, a credenza with appropriate
liquor bottle and glasses and a lounge chair. There is a desk of some size to
the left with a desk chair, a computer, phone, etc. A huge TV screen is visible
on the sidewall. A full length mirror hangs next to the entrance doors facing
the audience. Faint elevator music can
be heard riding quietly over the set.
As
the curtain parts, a shuffling of feet and muffled voices can be heard outside
the door. The door opens with a flourish as Powell comes into view. He’s
dressed in formal overcoat and scarf; he carries an attaché case. As he enters
the room, he appears to dismiss someone with a rapid gesture of his free arm.
He grabs the doorknob as he moves through the opening and slams the door
fiercely, muttering as he enters, visibly upset. As he utters the words below,
he has moved toward the desk on which he hurls his attaché case, throws his
coat over the chair, and moves to the lounge chair pulling at his scarf as he
goes. He’s dressed in full business suit, but tears at his tie and collar as
though he’s ridding himself of a prison uniform or slave’s rags.
POWELL:
GOD
damn! God DAMN! Won’t this ever end? What
madness am I mired in? What slough is this? What
lures me to this swamp, this pit of despond? Where
I drown in hopeless depression? Alone!
Oh, so alone!
Would that I
could Slough
off this role that smothers me, Hides
me from me, for God’s sake, And
I become a buffoon, a comic player Mouthing
the words of idiots, fools, That
mock those they claim to serve.
[He
rises from the chair, shirt now open to the waist, and prances in imitation of
Bush’s strutting as he mocks his Pretend Texas drawl exaggerating Bush’s sense
of superiority as he plays the “common man.”]
“Now,
you know what the man wants, Powell, I
mean, you know what he wants ta he’ar. He
wants you to tell him its OK to kidnap... Well,
maybe not kidnap, maybe, help Aristide Get
safely out a Haiti,
to save his life, You
know, ‘cause we’re the good guys! We
need you there, Colin, cause you’s The
black guy that knows what’s good for them. And
if you say it’s OK, then it’s OK!”
[He
returns to his own voice, and in fury speaks the following lines.]
Mouthing
the words of idiots; the fool That
plays his part, then departs to play The
fool again to the plaudits of the powers That
pull the strings that make me twitch
[He
suddenly grabs at his chest as a real pain hits. He stops talking and lets the
moment pass. Then he speaks the following lines in a subdued meditative
reflection.]
Where
have I buried everything I longed to be? What
road led me to this barren place? Why
do I do what I do when I can see That
it has blackened my soul and whitened my face? Have
I succumbed to such hypocrisy That
I can no longer trace The
roots that hungered to be free, That
gave purpose to my being and to my race?
[He
grabs the remote and turns on the TV to find the evening news. He watches in
silence as the anchorman turns to the UN story of the flight of Aristide out of
Haiti. No one
seems to know where he has gone or why, just a desperate flight to safety done
with American aid. The cameraman turns to his interview with Powell, the
administration’s spokesman on the issue. He explains how Aristide’s life and
those of his family were in danger and the US
offered him a flight out of the country. He explains that Aristide had signed a
letter of resignation and the US
was acting in a true humanitarian spirit to help the beleaguered President. He
shuts off the TV and tosses the remote on the couch]
[Mocking
himself.]
That
is the most influential “Oreo” in the Nation! Colin,
“Oreo,” Powell! Black On
the inside, white on the outside, The
inside-out cookie, baked in a white oven!
[He
reverts to dialect as he responds to his own image on the screen.]
‘Who
is dat man? How come he look like me? He
sound like me, but he not be me!’
Oh,
how I wish that were so, That
I might rest in the black night Knowing
I had deserved the sleep That
crowns those who fought the good fight.
But
sleep eludes me, escapes my grasp As
though it were a convict on the loose, And
I the Pink Panther’s stumbling fool That
follows the rule to its inevitable end, An
ironic ridicule of reason and civility. The
face before the camera, quiet, assured, The
very cadence of civilized man Explaining
the unexplainable in measured Tones
that none would dare to question Lest
they appear the fool!
[He
moves to the desk, opens the attaché case and rummages inside pulling papers
and disks from its innards. He appears to be searching for a specific disk. He
locates it, turns to the computer and inserts the disk. The images come on the
big screen. He lands in the desk chair. It has wheels so he can move around on
the upper floor and he enjoys this mobility.]
Ah!
Got it!
Fools caught in the act!
[He
gleefully points the remote at the screen. Cheney’s
face appears.]
Here,
here’s the Iago with infernal sneer, Tilted
head, and varnished voice; The
asp in the ear of the mannequin, That
slips its hateful venom Into
that vapid space, unknown To
a mind grown dull in time, Doltish
from drugs and drink.
What
demonic demands does He
inject into that dummy? What
mind possesses such scorn For
the common man called to slaughter? What
evil ego glows so deep In
the cauldron of his soul That
he can send the innocent To
their death without remorse Even
as he slides guiltlessly Beyond
the killing fields he creates?
This!
This face must I face Each
day, feign joy In
its presence, bestow my obsequiousness Like
some sheepish lapdog On
this grotesquerie that leers At
the world from behind its Sadistic
mind, sick with desire To
control, aye control – not Just
a man, but the Goddamn world!
To
this I bow, the house nigger That
ties his fortune to white power Cause
he knows the whip’s sting Awaits
should he turn against Those
who gave him entrance To
the hollowed halls that control all!
How
high do I rise! Ah,
so far, the cries of those in chains So
long ago are but whispers now, No
longer the lingering lamentations Of kindred souls searching for one To
right the wrongs they endured.
That
was me when I was young, Full
of vinegar pulsing through my veins, Afraid
of none, hero to all! I
lived the Goddamned dream! Naive
perhaps? No! No! Ignorant! Stupidly
believing it was there for me; A
dream for whitey only, Dressed
in lies, wearing a black face, Mocking
my every step as I crept Up
the ladder, rung by agonizing Rung,
and lost my soul!
[He
lurches for the remote and desperately points to the screen for another
picture. Cheney disappears and the screen goes blank.]
Enough
of this gargoyle Whose
slimy thoughts drip Over
his protruding tongue And
fall like acid drops below. Another,
I’ll have another To
sooth my smoldering anger.
But
first, I need an elixir To
drown this gnawing pain That
strains at my gut Like
some knife of shame, A
two edged blade bloodied By
deeds done in silence And
lies told to hide the truth. It
twists inside cutting honor As
deeply as it does my heart.
[He
lifts himself from the rolling chair, and as he does so he instinctively grabs
his gut as if in pain, and makes his way to the decanter where he pours a tall
glass into which he tosses a couple of ice cubes. He takes a long drink letting
the liquor slide smoothly down his throat. He moves silently and dejectedly to
the “L” shaped couch and points the remote.]
Now!
Now there’s a face!
[Wolfowitz’
face comes on the screen. He leans forward looking intensely at the face.]]
Conceited,
conniving, coarse, No!
More! Warped, obsessed; Ah,
yes, obsessed and diabolical, The
Rasputin of our noble court! Out
of his pen pours prejudice Garbed
in learned jargon, Absolute
in its oblique assertions That
turns the simple mind That
rules this misguided nation.
That,
too, must I bow before, Lest
I offend the ass to which His
nose is hooked, browned By
years of cowering subservience To
hold the pants of those in power! If
I grovel, how much more does he? But
I know it; he cares not For
he has no morals, nothing But
the void beneath that face.
What
evil has he perpetrated And
forced on a beguiled nation! What
deceit lives behind those eyes, A
veritable nest of maggots That
lives on lies,
Yet he greets
The
world in fawning smiles, The
very image of the candy man Who
brings hope to all, When
in fact, he is the Iceman!
God,
what a bloody crew Of
blind men leads this country Down
the path to the ditch of doom.
I
grow morose and cynical; There
must be laughter To
quell these doldrums Or
I go mad!
[He
gets more and more animated as the following lines are spoken and rises from
the chair moving around the room.]
What fool Can
I beckon to my cause? Whose
image presents itself? I
feel like Faust In
the fulness of his power As
he summoned Mephistopheles To
raise the radiant Helen Before
his eyes.
Here, here is my Demon
on call, a plastic remote That
summons the radiance of, Rumsfeld!
Now,
there is grace, comeliness, charm! A
smile to bedevil the gods, Eyes
squinting in the glare, Of
his own brilliance that shines Forth
from his eloquent mouth In
phrases picked from the Tree of Knowledge Before
the gates of heaven slammed shut. Or
so he believes in his gut. So
sad how an ego can pluck Sense
from the mind of men.
How
he beguiles the press, Who
prance before his podium Like
homeless waifs in old England, Awaiting
the proffered pence From
the hands of the blessed chosen. He
regales them with known knowns, Known
unknowns, and unknown unknowns And
they scribble these pearls of wisdom Onto
their notepads like obedient children, Ignorant
of their sense while he Loses
the horror of war and terror In
jazzy riffs of obfuscation, And
they, befuddled by his merriment, Forget
the death and destruction He
came to announce to the nation.
Oh,
how many talking fools bob Before
the multitudes on fluid screens, Chortling
with glee this clown’s Distortions
of truth,
Fed things That
haven’t happened, could not Have
happened had they sense. They
have mesmerized the people, Who
sit in silent acceptance Of
fallacies only an O’Reilly or Rush Could
conjure as certitude, Minds
made infallible by ignorance And
ego.
To think I knew them, Knew
them all before, yet yielded To
their feigned entreaties to join The
team to make “America
great.” And,
“Yes!” “Yes,” I would have Total
control of State, free To
assert a direction and design; The
fulfillment of a dream deferred, The
mark of the oppressed visible To
all at last as I guided the ship of State. What
a joke! What ignorance propelled me? What
made me think power Would
be handed to a nigger? Did
I think the true thought Evaporated
when the word was expunged? Have
I joined the Hollow men: Heartless,
cruel, vengeful, cursed? Shall
I ride this frightful hearse To
its ineluctable end, Or
shall I pluck myself free, And
pray I can salvage eternity?
If
there is one face that epitomizes This
ship of fools, it is this!
[He
points the remote and Rumsfeld disappears. In a moment, Karl Rove’s face covers
the screen. He moves close to the screen drinking in the features of this man.
Now subdued by some hidden force, grasping his temples as if in pain, he turns
toward the audience and mutters the following.]
This,
this is not a face of flesh. There
is no person here, no form That
grew in time from the mewling child; Rather
this is the face of heaven cursed To
wander the earth forever; Lucifer
incarnate in our shape, Vengeance
made palpable, Searching
the destruction of God’s creation; The
Mariner damned to repeat his crime Day
after day, to live its horror Before
all mankind, alone and barren, Bereft
of human kindness and love, A
pitiless wandering form without substance Without
conscience, without compassion, without remorse.
Power
and control propel this monster; Oblivious
to pain and suffering Since
he cannot die again; His
life is everlasting death. Damned
to wander through the world’s Byways
witness to the weeping Mothers
and children who cling To
each other despite the devastation; He
sees the love that binds, a love He
cannot share though he knows It
alone is life’s fulfillment.
Such
is the power that plays with this
putty!
[He
points the remote to the screen and blanks out Rove; in his place appears that
of Bush. As he continues his litany of fools, he changes the picture of Bush to
depict the points he’s making. Bush in uniform, Bush in a Ranger baseball
jacket, Bush with a hard hat, Bush leering, Bush sneering, Bush walking the Texas
walk, i.e. like someone walking through a field of corn stalks.]
Here
is true comedia dell’arte, The
mask presented to the people, And
the voice that speaks through the mask, Personified
evil in the form of Rove. America
hears the self-mocking fool And
loves his bumbling manner; But
neither the fool nor the people Know
the source of his mindless banter.
This
Lucifer ties two threads of fate With
magnificent dexterity: The
neo-cons’ sugar-coated hate And
God’s gift to humanity, As
sold by the righteous marketers Who
coat the hearts and minds Of
their idolaters with fear and prophecy.
Oh,
I should raise the specters Of
all his evil horde this night, To
haunt my dreams and drive my despair As
I grope in blindness to confront What
comfort I have conferred on this crew, That
does the bidding of Beelzebub, Casting
the naive and innocent to their doom.
I
can’t let them escape this catalogue of hate That
spreads their images before my mind, As
they spread their lies and deceit before The
people they vowed to protect, Images
of hypocrisy garbed in the gowns Of
God’s chosen;
Prophets as real As
the storied Patriarchs that predicted God’s Reign
of wrath threatening his creatures With
the sword of fire to destroy those He
came to save!
Their names Must
be emblazoned on the forehead of time, A
monument to their everlasting crime: Falwell,
Graham, Robertson, and Hagee, The
Dominionists, End-timers, and Lindsey, All
who presumed to know the word of God, Using
fear, not love, to drive their ambitions!
These
deceivers drove the frightened And
afflicted to give aid and comfort To
terrorists who plagued the poor Palestinians, Finding
justice in the horror of God’s Armageddon
that gave right to might As
it blessed the lies of these dissemblers.
I
saw them come and go, And
met them in their temples of gold, But
said not a word of dissent; What
stubborn will kept me silent? Why
could I not speak, why not cry To
the very heavens how they betray The
compassionate Christ they claim to love? Where
have I buried my sinful soul?
[He
turns to point to Bush’s image on the screen, flicks to one that shows him humbly
bowed in prayer, in church, eyes closed. He turns toward the audience as though
to continue his meditation but shows in a grimace the pain inside. After a
moment, he begins.]
There
bows the born again Christian, Self-righteous
in his indignation of those Who
question his declaration of who is evil, And
who is blessed by God to lead his mission Of
salvation against the infidels that threaten His
dominion throughout the world! In
his humble hands lies the fate Of
humankind. Does he believe these myths? Is
he an imposter, a fraud, blind, or delusional? Does
the deception reside in Rove’s artifice Or
do I serve a man of infinite deceit?
Certainly
I am to blame for this.
[He
uses the remote to bring up a picture of Bush in his guard uniform.]
I
chose to serve the chicken hawks, The
very image of those I once decried, Cowards
who send the young and poor To
serve in their staid, whole bodies Used
as organs to salvage the rich!
What
images come to mind Of
Cheney’s snarl, face to face With
the sergeants’ call to pushups! Wolfowitz
and Perle bedecked in ribbons That
flow over their protruding guts, While
Junior wades through fields of mud On
his way to the local pub! What
visions of security they portray! Perhaps
it’s better they not serve, But
rather salute real men in battle array.
Yet
to him and to them I pay homage, To
Hollow men come to life; No
longer the forgotten images Of
Eliot’s barren waste, but Bones
fleshed in cynicism and hate.
[He
shuts off the remote, and in quiet dejection moves across the room to the
full-length mirror. His face reflects the pain that flares up from time to time
throughout the monologue. He turns to look at himself in the mirror, back now
to the audience, though they can see his front in the reflection. He begins to
speak in a quiet but deeply meditative manner.]
Eyes
I would not dare to meet In
death’s dream kingdom, I
greet in full obeisance, Like
some Mas’sr of old, With
shifting feet and eyes to the ground, The
invisible man shuffling around Lest
I be flung from these citadels That
I breached these many years ago.
Oh,
God, what years I have devoted To
duty and dedication that it should Come
to this night of reparation, Where
I confront myself, defeated And
alone, like some aged penitent That
shambles toward the confessional, Trembling
and terrified that absolution Will
be denied and death will not come; But
morning will, and every store window Will
tell of deeds done in silence Truths
not told, defiance put on hold.
I
stand here before the only face That
must confront the faces it has met, That
must judge itself, not them, For
they are but ghosts of my own decisions Or
indecisions that have wrought the chaos That
plagues me this night.
Now
must I play priest and penitent, Conjure
up points in time that Pricked
my soul as I capitulated To
those who held my future By
a tether, like Edward’s spider over the flame, Ready
to drop me into the perdition Of
lost opportunity and advancement, To
breach the walls of whitey’s fortress, After
four hundred years of sweat, Of
humiliation and defeat, to subvert From
within the very system that controlled The
oppressed and determined their fate. That
was the dream that turned to nightmare.
[He
wanders before the mirror, weaving back and forth as he unfurls these lines,
stopping to look at himself, sometimes with an expression of deep depression,
sometimes pain, physical pain that finds visibility in his breast or temples.
It is as though he is mirroring his emotional state in the deterioration of his
body.]
I
know the day and hour of my defeat! It
was a sin of omission, of known Horror
untold, of cold bodies Buried
beneath the clay of My Lai. I
knew and said nothing, and learned That
silence has its own rewards For
those in power, who control others By
controlling what they know. That
omission earned me stars, And
forged the first link in my chain That
grew like Morley’s day by day Until
I was fettered as solidly as any Of
my forebears who served as chattel For
that civil society that shackled the slave.
[He
stands before the mirror and buttons up his shirt, straightens his collar. He
stands at attention, shirt tucked in, belly pulled in, looking at himself and
imagining his early years in uniform.]
I
cut a pretty picture then, A
useful tint to present to the public, Carefully
manicured in my ribbons and stars, The
perfect image for the Party of the people.
Used,
used as only Patricians use the slave: I
dressed out their dining hall, I
stood, impassive and pressed, beside Their
elegantly dressed wives bedecked With
pearls and diamonds … and gleaming smiles. I
knew my place and kept it well, Adding,
day by day, a new link To
the chain that choked my conscience, Shutting
out the air of reason and right, As
I crawled home each night To
seek solace in darkness, Ah,
yes, to crawl out of the light!
[He
slumps down on his knees, head bowed like the penitent.]
How
corrupt have I become? Do
I act now without regard For
right or wrong? Do I Instill
my desires on my own kin? Do
I link them to my chain, prisoners Of
my foibles, victims of “duty’s” excuse That
releases me from judgment to acquiesce To
those who pull my chain?
Oh,
I am not Prince Hamlet, in deed, A
pun as corpulent as my dejected mood; I’m
not even Lord Procrastinator, Who
has at least the prospect of becoming; I
have forgone all, lost the chance to act. I
have become the victim of Cheney’s venom, Just
another mannequin to be placed In
his window, dressed to do his bidding,
[He
rises from his knees and goes for another drink. As he stands at the credenza,
his hand begins to shake and the liquor spills. He grabs at his breast. Puts
the glass down hurriedly, and stumbles to the couch edge. A little time passes
and then he begins the following gaining momentum as he speaks.]
Why,
if I am content to be his lackey, Do
I suffer so? I tried, I tried to stop The
first slaughter that ended In
the Highway of Death, that graveyard Of
bleached skulls and seared skin, Our
everlasting memorial To
that glorious little war, That
made me a household name.
But
once started, I did nothing to stop it. No,
that’s not true, I did do something; I
supported it, lying to myself That
duty required I obey; The
pitiful lie all must use Who
follow the bloody trail Their
master takes. That lie They
knew I would tell myself, And
so I became both Master and slave! What
irony rules a life That
turns the whip upon itself. That
blackness in evil seals my fate! Shackled
to duty I abhor, Champion
of slaughters demanded By
those I hate, the loathsome horde That
guides this benumbed state!
That
time passed, and I pushed My
guilt deep inside that I might hide It
from myself. But it festered there; It
haunts me now; it grows a cancer In
my breast and taunts my being. It
metastasises, for God’s sake, Because
it multiplies each day I Live
in this den of vipers who Entwine
their lies like serpents in a nest, Strangling
my will, my desires, my soul.
[He
is circling the stage at this point as though tracked by some unseen fury. He
grasps his temples at times, desperate to flee the torment he is recalling.]
How
I gagged when Rumsfeld shoved Those
sheets of deception before me; Page
upon page of distortion and invention, Equivocation
and evasion, presented as truth To
beguile the world by this Charlatan, Who
coquettishly delivered the Judas kiss To
those he admired, the very diplomats That
cried out against the Machiavellian Antics
of this Satanic crew!
Then,
too, I objected when I threw Those
sheets against the wall, Demanding
they give me evidence, Not
concoctions hatched by sick minds, That,
once delivered, makes me their Pharisee. Yet
Pharisee I became, Presenting
their law before The
world’s court, mouthing their lies As
truth, while my innards burned!
Had
I then stood against their will, The
very heavens would have given thanks! And
the chains, the chains that bind Even
now would have fallen From
my heart and sunk like lead Into
the swollen sea. And, blessed God, I
would be free!
But
now I walk the world a clown, Bush’s
buffoon, believed by none! Pushed
around the globe to justify Neo-con
hypocrisy, a roving dummy Doomed
to drive an agenda of destruction.
Ah,
what self-hate sits like ice in my breast, Freezing
my heart against the pain I
witnessed in Jenin, as Sharon’s
siege Laid
waste the destitute and helpless; People
oppressed, damned by indifference And
deceit to suffer in the sun’s glare The
cruel savagery of these fiends. I,
I live their pain, captive of these same Demons,
and I suffer with my brother.
Yet
I did a dastardly thing When
I circled their plight, Taking
unnecessary flight to Egypt, That
Sharon have time to ravage their
homes, And
massacre the mothers and children Who
could not flee the terror of his wrath. The
whole world cried in despair As
I crawled slowly to the carnage That
I let happen for their sake, Adding
still more dead to the links That
I drag weeping into eternity.
Why
can I not act? What
makes me cow to those I loath? What
force drives this shame? For
force it is that compels me to live In
a cauldron of self-hate, yet go forth Each
day to build another crime More
hideous than the last, To
approve the wall that stands A
monument to racist hate, encircling Those
held captive by murderers and thieves; To
cry foul when the world court Condemns
the ethnic imprisonment of people Unable
to defend themselves against oppression; To
proclaim as justified the stealing Of
Palestinian land negating by my act The
declared will of nations united in voice Against
this insidious betrayal.
Good
God, what reparations must I make? To
whom do I make them now? Have
I a soul to save?
I
have lived this dark night In
fear and dread having cast My
lot this day with tragic irony As
I stood alone, the bumbling Patsy For
this pathetic crew, escorting Democracy
out of Haiti!
Kidnaping it In
the dead of night, a tragicomic Knight, Destined
to be mocked and derided, A
figure of infinite ridicule and scorn!
How
fitting this end to this ignoble career. What
message does it send? Am
I at least an example that can teach The
folly of impregnable duty, Of
deeds done in silence that corrupt, Of
deceit made truth that corrodes The
decency we’ve been taught, Of
dreams deferred and lost?
When
pride rides its phantasm steed, Seeking
the golden apple of greed And
gain, and power, believing it The
elixir of life, time intrudes To
erase the mirage, leaving only A
residue of lost hope and desire. Oh,
God, I would I were dead!
[He
collapses on the lounge chair, arms spread, head on chest as the curtain
closes.]
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